What do you think of switching to “script format” for dialogue for a few pages in a story that is otherwise standard prose?
Jerry: This is script format.
Akeem (angrily): We know that! (shakes their fist)
I have a scene w/ a large group of characters who are discussing and arguing an important issue. While the argument (I hope) has plenty of conflict and tension, there is no physical activity here. A script format would allow me to present each person’s dialogue w/o having to worry about dialogue tags.
But would this sudden change in style be distracting? Or annoying? Or seen as just plain lazy?
Thank you
-Dave L
Hey Dave, Oren here. Great to hear from you again!
The short version is that I wouldn’t recommend doing this. It won’t have the effect you’re going for, and it’ll cause a bunch of other problems. I say this for a few reasons.
First, changing a story’s format should generally be avoided, regardless of what the change is. If the reader gets used to one set of conventions, it’s annoying to switch over to a new one. Most often, this applies to POV or tense shifts. A lot of authors want to change between first and third person, or past and present tense, but it’s rarely a good idea. This would have the same problem, forcing readers to reorient themselves and pushing them out of your story.
For the script format specifically, there’s a good reason we don’t write prose stories that way: it isn’t fun to read. Having the character’s name at the beginning of every line gets annoying fast, and it isn’t any better than repeating “said.” Putting description in stage direction form is even worse. It’s too much telling when you need to be showing, and it throws readers out of the story. This is bad enough when a story is read; it’s much worse in audio when readers can’t easily scan over stuff.
For a script, that’s okay. Script’s aren’t meant to be enjoyable reading material; they’re instructions for making a movie, TV show, or play. It’s most important that they be efficient in delivering their information so actors can figure out their scenes. Writing our stories that way would be giving up the main advantage prose has.
In your specific sequence, if the issue is dialogue attribution, then the better option is mix up tags like “said” with some minor action by the character who’s about to speak.
“This is another example,” Jerry said.
Akeem frowned. “You don’t say.”
If that’s not enough, then you might simply have too much dialogue. In that case, whatever the characters are talking about might need to be simplified, or this discussion might need to be spread out over other scenes so it can be interspersed with some action.
Hope that helps, and good luck with your story!
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From what I understand, scripts are also better for audio dramas because actors are involved. Correct me if I’m wrong on that.
Scripts are used for any kind of performance, because here it’s all about the information the performers need. So if you have any kind of performance – TV series, movie, audio drama, stage play – you should use the script format. The actual performance will then convey everything to the audience.
For novels, that’s not a good format – few people enjoy reading this type of format, although I admit to being one of them. I’ve always enjoyed reading scripts, screenplays, etc.
Ah, now I believe I understand. Thanks.
One trick you can use in dialog scenes without much action is to break up the dialog with the narrator’s reactions and thoughts, if you’re in close first or third perspective, or with the narrator’s commentary if you’re in omniscient. It doesn’t help with dialog attribution, but it can help the scene flow better without describing facial and body language in every other line.
Edgar Cantero did it quite well—and sparingly—in Meddling Kids, a novel I love. It did make it harder to read aloud to a loved one, though, and now I’m wondering how it was represented in audio format.
Thank you for answering this
I will have to rethink some scenes, then
I have seen this done if you’re willing to go all out with epistolary style using other things than the standard journal entries or letters, though it almost certainly isn’t worth it. The Illuminae Files trilogy has a couple of scenes that use a style like this, in which it represents audio surveillance of a conversation with several parties. It has most of the story told via emails and text logs, backed up with an unusual narrator in an AI system and surveillance logs that use essentially standard narration style. There are also a couple of bits that use unusual documents like an audio surveillance log from a space warship’s bridge during a battle or a police report.
There are two problems with going with a style like this. The first one is practical. While you do get some serious points for novelty with this style, that is literally paid for by the publisher because you need to format in a significantly different way than a standard novel and likely pay for more pages because there is less information density than a standard novel format. The audiobook was even done in the style of a radio drama with a voice cast and audio special effects, which was again cool but would require more money from a publisher. The second problem is that it takes more work to write because it is so unusual as well as more cognitive load from the reader for them to get into it in the first place. This makes it harder to have any other sort of novelty in your story because you’re spending most of your narrative currency on style rather than having points left to spend on worldbuilding.
If your story is set in a modern setting, you can have the characters have the discussion through a chatroom app; proper social distancing, avatars, emoji, chatspeak, and all. Pros: so-so novelty. Cons: this is so annoying to read.
Any digs in the above paragraph at Homestuck are unintentional. Or are they?
The trick I tend to use is to pair dialogue with character action or thoughts to clarify who is speaking.
“I know!” Jeremy’s eyes brightened. “I’ll use script format instead of dialogue tags in my big discussion scene!”
Akeem rolled their eyes. Jeremy had potential as an author, but he was inexperienced, so a lot of his instincts still stunk. “It isn’t going to go how you think, Jeremy. There’s a reason script format is so rare in prose fiction.”
Priya flashed Jeremy a disarming smile. “I have an idea. Why don’t you use my dialogue trick?”
I didn’t use any dialogue tags, but you can still tell who is speaking: first Jeremy, then Akeem, then Priya. I also get to show character attitudes and behavior without directly telling how the characters feel. I can’t always use this method: sometimes I can’t think of a character action or thought that works, or I want to establish that a character is speaking at a certain volume. Then I have to use a dialogue tag.
“Why is writing so hard?” Jeremy groaned, collapsing into the sofa.
Priya patted Jeremy on the shoulder. “It’s okay,” she said. “We’ve all been there.”
But I think if you use the trick, you’ll be pleasantly surprised by how characterful you can make your dialogue scenes without adding verbal clutter. Hope this helps!