Two people in fancy romantic clothing are clasping hands and looking longingly into each other’s eyes.

Lovebird 1: I am nothing but a dried husk in an empty desert without your cool, refreshing presence to rehydrate me.

Lovebird 2: Without your calming touch, my heart is a tornado that destroys everything in its path.

Lovebird 1: I beg of you, tell me you will be with me until the end of days!

Lovebird 2: I would give my very soul if it would keep us together, but –

Lovebird 2 reaches into a hat behind them labeled “Hasty Obstacles” and takes out a paper slip. They read it.

Lovebird 2: – all love is forbidden!

Lovebird 1 is also reading a slip of paper.

Lovebird 1: I got “afraid of commitment.”

P.S. Our bills are paid by our wonderful patrons. Could you chip in?

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